Communication is Everything

This past Monday, as I was teaching, doing some sort of charades for my students, I noticed a man standing in the door of the classroom, watching.  I looked over at my co-teacher, Supattra and she went to see what the man wanted.  I continued doing my thing.

After class, as I was getting ready to sit down with some luscious Thai oranges for lunch, which they call “som”, Supattra comes over and I can tell she has something to say.  But Thais avoid confrontation, they avoid strong emotion all the way around.  So I ask her what is wrong.

She blurts, “The policeman say there was an accident and foreigner was driving.  I tell him he is wrong.  But he wants Ba-ba-la to come to the station.”

I sit for a minute trying to understand what she said.  I ask, “He thinks Barbara was driving and caused an accident?”  She says, “YES!  I know he is wrong!”  I grab my purse and say “Let’s go”.

As a Peace Corps volunteer in Thailand, we are  forbidden from driving a car.  That and riding a motorcycle are “non-negotiables” and Peace Corps will send us home immediately if we break the rule.  Even though I know I am innocent of this crime for which I am being accused, during the short drive to the police station, my active brain goes into overdrive.  The conversation in my head went something like this:

“I can’t drive.  Don’t they know that?  I can prove it right?  But I saw the movie “Brokedown Palace”–people go to Thai jail even when telling the truth.  Tina said she was worried I would end up in a Thai prison.  Crap.  Maybe Supattra got it wrong.  Maybe I caused an accident while walking around somewhere.  Did I?  I could have.  Thai drivers are crazy.  Maybe as I was crossing the street someone did something.  Crap.  Why would someone blame me?  Don”t they like me?  Why don’t they like me?  I’m going to jail.  I need a bathroom.”

When we arrive at the police station, all eyes are on us.  They sit us first at a long conference table and then bring us into an office with several policemen.  The main guy asks if I speak Thai.  I answer that I speak Thai a little.  I answered in English because at that moment, every bit of Thai I know seems to have vanished from my brain.  My heart is pounding, I know my face is red.  I’m actually praying for a heart attack versus a Thai jail.  The policeman asks for my I.D. and for Supattra’s.  He takes copies of them and says something to Supattra.  She says to me, “The driver is Austrlian”.

“What?  Some crazy Aussie has accused me of doing something?  Causing an accident?  *&^*&%%. ”  I said to Supattra, “Tell them Barbara cannot drive.  I would get sent home.”  She says, “I tell them.  They are wrong.”.  Thai people do not like to be wrong.  There is this concept of “breaking face” and Thai people will go to extreme measures to not break face–admitting a mistake would be breaking face.  I’m screwed.  I’m going to jail.  Where is that bathroom?

Fighting the urge to laugh maniacally, and the sister urge to run as fast as I can, I finally stand up and say, “I need to call Peace Corps.”  I step outside the office and call our security director, Kuhn Pahnutat.  He answers on the second ring and as I try to hold back the tears and the fear, I tell him what is going on.  He asks to speak to the policeman.  I really need to find a bathroom.

I walk back into the office, hand over my phone, and then sit, frozen, trying to understand anything that is being said.  All I hear is Charlie Brown’s teacher, “Wah, whaha, wah, wah wa wah.”  After what seems like an eternity, a time where I am trying to ignore the ever increasing buzz in my ears,  the police man gives me back my phone and I walk to the corner, my heart in my throat, my head ready to explode.  I hear Kuhn Pahnutat’s voice.

“Barbara, no worries.  They don’t think you caused the accident.  A foreigner was driving.  They want you to help translate when they question him.  It would be a big help to them.”  Whoooooooosh.  My blood is finally back in my head.  I instantly feel my blood pressure drop.  Suppatra got it wrong.  Either she didn’t understand what they wanted, or communicated it wrong—  I don’t know.  But for the first time in an hour, I took a full breath and suddenly didn’t need a bathroom anymore.

Oh, Thailand……You got me again.